Orinda's Eternal Memories Pet Taxidermy Offers Space Send-off for Pets
Source: Eternal Memories brochure
Orinda, CA – Eternal Memories, a local pet taxidermy shop in Orinda, is pushing the boundaries of traditional pet memorial services by offering to send deceased pets into a geosynchronous orbit over the community. This innovative service has sparked many reactions among local residents, from excitement to concern.
The unique service allows pet owners to know that their beloved pets remain "above" them, literally orbiting the Earth directly over Orinda. "It's a comforting thought just to look up and feel like your pet is still with you, watching over you," said one enthusiastic pet owner considering the service for her aging Labrador.
However, the service has also raised several practical and ethical questions. Some residents are concerned about the logistics of such a service, particularly if they decide to move away from Orinda. "What happens if you move to another state or country? How would you reposition your pet's orbit to follow you?" questioned a concerned citizen, highlighting the complexities of the new offering.
The discussion has also veered into the environmental impact of launching remains into space. Critics argue that the carbon footprint associated with space launches makes this an environmentally unfriendly option. Alternative suggestions, such as using a dirigible or blimp for a more localized aerial memorial, have been proposed as potentially more sustainable choices than launching an entire pet into space.
Among the more whimsical inquiries from the community are questions about the specifics of the space send-off. "Will my pet be wearing a space suit? What color options are available?" asked another intrigued resident, half-jokingly. There are even debates about whether purebred pets should be kept in separate orbits from mixed breeds, highlighting potential customers' varied and sometimes bizarre concerns.
Representative Mark Andrews has publicly expressed his support for the initiative, citing it as an example of the innovative spirit within the community. In a surprising revelation, he mentioned that his family has signed up their family cat, Angelica, for the service. The decision was influenced by a desire to enhance his political image, as studies suggest that dog and bird owners are perceived more favorably than cat owners when facing a recall election. "The decision to euthanize Angelica is a tough one but we believe this unique send-off for Angelica will honor her and align with our family's political future," explained Andrews. "I’d be happy to put anybody’s cat, live or dead, in a cannon, and shoot it off torwards Lafayette. I hate cats and feel the same about Lafayette" stated Todd Schluter, age 76. Schluter is still under investigation by the Orinda Police for the potential theft of puzzle pieces from the Orinda Senior Center. The Local Tattle was unable to verify at the time of publication whether Mr. Schluter owns a cannon.
The service has undoubtedly stirred a mix of emotions and opinions within Orinda, reflecting the community's diverse attitudes towards pet memorialization and environmental responsibility. As Eternal Memories prepares to launch its first pet into orbit, the community watches with awe and apprehension, pondering the implications of such a celestial farewell.
Previous article on Eternal Memories: https://www.localtattler.com/news/eternal-companions-orindas-first-pet-taxidermy-service-to-open-in-bustling-theater-square-retail-corridor