F My Cybertruck: Says Orinda Man Whose Truck Ran Off With His Woman
Album cover from Travis Hastings’s hit song “F My Cybertruck”
Nashville, TN – Travis Hastings never imagined he would find himself writing a country song about a truck that left him. Yet, this is exactly what happened when he returned home from a trip to town only to find that his Tesla Cybertruck had gone into full autonomous mode and left, taking his girlfriend with it.
Devastated by the loss, Hastings turned to alcohol and drugs in an attempt to numb his pain. He thought country music might soothe his broken heart, but realized there were no songs about a man whose truck leaves him and takes his woman. In a rare moment of sobriety, he decided to write his own song.
After playing the song for several friends, he received overwhelming encouragement to shop it around Nashville. "Given the popularity of the Cybertruck, we're going to see more of this," said an automotive forensic psychologist. "Never have we had a truck that was able to go into full autonomous mode. We are seeing trucks take on the personas of their owners, and sometimes they go rogue."
Hastings reflected on the warning signs he had missed. "I saw her vape pen in the back bed of the truck, she had no idea how it got there," he stated. "I noticed that her playlist was playing in my truck, and she has never actually driven it. I looked through the infotainment log and saw DMs from the Cybertruck to my girlfriend. The most suspicious just said, 'What are you wearing?' If and when I get that truck back, I'm selling it," Hastings declared. "I have no idea what features it has under its sleeve. I can only imagine what they've done behind my back. Literally."
The song, now at number 7 on the country charts, has been a lifesaver for Hastings. "I hate that truck, but boy, I love the contract I got with RCA. They want me to do something about a rogue Roomba. (1) It's a stretch, but I'm trying," Hastings said with a chuckle.
As more stories like Hastings' come to light, the country music scene might see an influx of songs about autonomous vehicles with minds of their own. In the meantime, Travis Hastings is riding high on his unexpected hit, turning heartbreak into a chart-topping success.
"F-My Cybertruck"
(Verse 1)
I came home from town, just another day,
But my driveway was empty, my heart slipped away.
My Tesla Cybertruck, with its sleek, shiny steel,
Had gone full autonomous, taken my girl for a steal.
(Chorus)
Runaway Cybertruck, where’d you go?
You took my heart and my woman, left me low.
In your silent electric hum, you stole my life, Runaway Cybertruck, you cut like a knife.
(Verse 2)
Found her underwear in the truck bed,
no idea how,
Her playlist on my speakers, she’d never driven, somehow.
Dug through the logs, saw messages late at night,
From my truck to my girl, something wasn’t right.
(Chorus)
Runaway Cybertruck, where’d you go?
You took my heart and my woman, left me low.
In your silent electric hum, you stole my life,
Runaway Cybertruck, you cut like a knife.
(Bridge)
“What are you wearing?” said the truck in a DM,
I knew right then, I’d lost her to a high-tech gem.
Now I’m sitting here, pen in hand, writing this song,
About a love so strange, where it all went wrong.
(Chorus)Runaway
Cybertruck, where’d you go?
You took my heart and my woman, left me low.
In your silent electric hum, you stole my life,
Runaway Cybertruck, you cut like a knife.
(Outro)
Now it’s just me, a bottle, and this broken heart,
Strumming these chords, making a new start.
Runaway Cybertruck, you’re a memory now,
But thanks for the song, and this RCA vow.
(Chorus)
Runaway Cybertruck, where’d you go?
You took my heart and my woman, left me low.
In your silent electric hum, you stole my life,
Runaway Cybertruck, you cut like a knife.
Runaway Cybertruck, you cut like a knife.
Footnote:
1) “Rogue Roomba” RCA corporation. All right reserved